Miracles Taken For Granted

As we settled for bed and our usual evening fuck, I was watching my
SO. Something had been bothering me for several days and so far I
hadn't been able to bring it out where I could study it. Idly, as I
admired her figure, I let my thoughts drift to our first meeting.

With startling clarity, I realized what had been bothering me.
"Helen?"

She raised her eyes so she could see my reflection in her mirror. A
slight tilt of her head let me know I had her attention.

"When was the last time we took the time to just relax and let
ourselves appreciate what we have?" I was struggling to find words
for an emotion that was running through me. "The sex. The closeness.
The gentle touches that say so much more than 'I love you'."

I spread my hands in a helpless gesture. "The wondrous miracle of it
all."

I trailed off in a whisper and with a wry smile. "Just...
Everything."

I waited. Her shoulders sagged and her normally sure movements slowed
to a stop. I saw tears start to run down her cheeks before she turned
to face me.

Her whisper was filled with a sort of bemused mix of horror and pain.
"Ray? I don't remember. Have we?"

I shook my head in my own denial. "I don't remember either. I don't
know if we have or not."

Both of us were crying. I walked over and stood behind her. I
reached up and gently began massaging the top of her shoulders and the
sides of her neck. She was tense. Extremely tense. Slowly, she began
to relax again.

"What made you think of that?" One of her hands came up and gently
held one of mine. "I don't take it for granted. I know you don't
take it for granted. Yet... We take it all for granted, don't we?"

"Yeah. Something like that. Things have been so good, for so long, I
felt like there was something I wasn't seeing. I was thinking about
how we met and that was the missing piece. I remembered what I didn't
have then. That made me realize that in the years since we met,
you've given me so much that I haven't stopped to take the time to say
'Thank You'."

"I've been so *content* and used to the happiness of being with
you..."

"That I've never taken the time to stop, take some time to appreciate
what we have, and then let you know how much I appreciate what you've
chosen to share with me. I'm sorry I've managed to treat things so
casually - for so long."

I let my hands rest on her shoulders and then I pulled her back
against me. "This. Just feeling you next to me. Knowing we've done
so much for each other. Trust. Shared pain. Even the anger during
misunderstandings. You're there. You keep me looking outside
myself."

I smiled at her reflection. "I love you. It's long past time that I
told you..." I stopped my rambling and pulled her into a firm hug.

"I think you're a walking miracle."

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